Rosie Wilby

Being dumped isn’t fun at all, yet comedian Rosie Wilby manages to find laugh-out-loud humour in the poignant stories of romantic woe, break-ups and heartbreak from our, and her, love lives that she has gathered together.

Coming to Somerville College Chapel on Friday 15 October at 7pm as part of IF Oxford, the science and ideas Festival, she will elaborate on relationships that go wrong, lovers good and bad, irritating habits, turn-offs, being dumped and how to leave, as aired in her new book The Breakup Monologues: The Unexpected Joy of Heartbreak.

“What the heck are ghosting, breadcrumbing and submarining?”

Rosie Wilby’s feisty, frank and entertaining sense of humour means she is a regular on BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s HourLoose EndsThe Human Zoo and Four Thought. Her first book Is Monogamy Dead? was shortlisted for the Diva Literary Awards 2017 and longlisted for the Polari First Book Prize 2018. Rosie also presents The Breakup Monologues podcast, which has been recommended by ChortleThe ObserverMetro and Time Out.

So her IF Oxford show looks set to be a great event for anyone who has even been in love, lost love, found it again or is thinking about future romance with either trepidation or rose-tinted glasses. 

But beware, because alongside her laugh-out-loud experiences in love, lessons in self-help and nuggets of real science, Rosie does make you question yourself: Are you a serial monogamist literally addicted to the rollercoaster drama of breakups and new relationships? Does a quick rebound relationship prevent cold turkey? Are you a victim of ghosting? And where do the Moths of Doom come in?

Apparently breaking wind is cited as a common reason for splitting up

What the heck are ghosting, breadcrumbing and submarining? Could a breakup be an opportunity for learning, healing and growth? Might a future pill be the answer to reduce the trauma of a breakup, all this and more will be discussed on Friday night.

Rosie’s tales are taken from her own experiences and those of others, which she then explores further with a whole host of scientists and researchers, from clinical psychologists to evolutionary anthropologists in a series of podcasts, The Breakup Monologues. 

this whistle-stop tour through the wilds of Wilby’s experiences could save your love life forever

Not that most of us expect to find ourselves in a sex lab, as Rosie did, wired up by a PhD student on the periphery of the University of Essex campus but everything Rosie says is both true and relatable.

She talks about sex openly, as an integral part of a relationship, in this whistle-stop tour through the wilds of Wilby’s experiences that could save your love life forever. 

As for the reasoning behind break-ups, Rosie wades right in. Apparently breaking wind is cited as a common reason for splitting up so could swearing on the underground, or a fart in a graveyard mark the beginning of a terminal decline?

It means you can also expect a fair helping of cats, dogs and comedy clubs, ‘domestic issues around living together’ (one of The Big Seven reasons that cause most relationship break downs according to author, nurse and counsellor Kathy Labriola), alongside musings on monogamy, what we can learn from gay relationships within a heteronormative social structure, professional pairings and the importance of family and other friendships too.

Plus, if breaking up and staying together are two sides of the same coin, as Rosie argues, then she might be just offer the relationship tool you’ve been looking for.

Either way, this brilliant night of comedy and laughs will be hugely entertaining, whether you learn anything or not.

Book tickets at: Rosie’s books will be on sale at the event.